For the love of a child

At the tender age of 14, I proudly proclaimed that when I grew up, I wanted to be a mom.  Mind you, I was in no hurry. And in actuality, it took another 22 years before I accomplished that goal and three years later, I added two more babies. On the other hand, I've totally changed careers in the last ten years so maybe I'm just a late bloomer.

Before children, who would have guessed the human heart could hold this much love, this much fear, this much pride?  In those days and months following the birth of a child, bleary-eyed and exhausted, those tiny fingers surround your own and you are hooked for life.  Cooing and giggles become music to your soul.  As they grow and mature, you explore a world of wonders together. Bugs and butterflies, rainbows and robins are nature's art. Making french toast becomes science. Bedtime stories provide experience in theater and family relations.

Rushing through the night with an infant who is struggling to breathe, you would give anything to exchange places with that frightened, struggling child. Shaking like a leaf as the plastic surgeon stitches up the cut above the same little boy's eye. And the experience of sheer terror when you've lost sight of your child on a crowded playground. You live with the mantra, please, please, please keep my child safe.

A slender girl twirling in her red dance dress smiles and that self-same heart swells with pride. Your son climbs into your lap with his favorite book and starts reading it to you for the very first time. Hundreds of small moments, first crawling and then walking; the first time they lay the bat on the ball; playing the violin; performing with the choir; making the team; make your heart sing with pride.

Through each and every one of those moments, the ones filled with love, or fear, or pride, you realize you would do anything for the love of a child. My life has never been the same since I heard my daughter's heart beat. I wouldn't want that other life back since I've been blessed with children.